Packing

September 30, 2009 at 7:17 pm (General Life Updates)

The last two days have been an endless parade of coughing and laundry. Not very pleasant. I’m starting to feel a little better and going longer between coughing fits. But man, women should NOT have to cough after having kids. Geez.

We leave in the morning as soon as we can pull P out of school after her picture day. So I’m trying to pack this evening while getting the kids ready for bed. Having a hard time focusing – I didn’t make a list and now I’m regretting it.

I have most of what I need set aside, and most of what the kids need. But I know there are a lot of little things I still need to gather. Okay, I’m off to make a list……

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September 29, 2009 at 6:48 pm (Daily Workouts/Eats, General Life Updates)

I’m sick, and I’m eating. I feel like all I’ve done for the last couple days is eat. I need to stop, but I’m struggling.

Feel yucky.

Did laundry, dishes, and dehydrating today. Not done with the dehydrating or the laundry. Have a lot more to do tomorrow. Leaving Thursday. Hoping I feel better tomorrow. Good enough to work out. I don’t think its going to happen tonight – but hopefully I’ll get control over the grazing.

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Weekend Recap: Got a cold

September 28, 2009 at 9:38 am (Daily Workouts/Eats, General Life Updates)

That’s not all I did, but right now that’s kind of overshadowing everything else.

SATURDAY:

  • Cleaned tub, toilet, bathroom floor. Organized bathroom cupboards under sink.
  • Did laundry, but didn’t put it away.
  • Mopped  Scrubbed kitchen floor (includes half bath and laundry room) on hands and knees. Then used this cool spray stuff that you spray on the floor and mop on and it makes the floor SHINY! Looks so pretty!
  • Swept the rest of the downstairs.
  • Worked out. Used moves that I learned from a video posted on a blog that I read. Sore today.
  • Dyed my SILs hair. Back was way sore. Tired from not getting that done until midnight.

SUNDAY:

Church

  • Home, eating too much. Been coughing since morning.
  • Took nap. Woke up still coughing and sore throat. Ugh.
  • Went to SILs for dinner. Spaghetti, bread, salad. Yum. Blackberry cobbler and ice cream.
  • Came home and kept eating. Watched Race to Witch Mountain. Fun movie, a little lame. Ate too much.
  • Went to bed not feeling well with cold and food-baby.

MONDAY:

Not going to work today due to sick. But might go to store anyway, so I guess I’m not that sick. 🙂 K is probably going to be doing some car maintenance today, but he’s still sleeping and fighting off a migraine. I hope he doesn’t start getting migraines like his mom does, frequently and debilitatingly.

So far today just had breakfast. Back on track with eating today. Told myself that yesterday was a high-calorie day and would help my weight loss in long run. Don’t know if that’s true or not, but definitely can’t afford two days like that.

GROSS WEEKEND EXPERIENCE:

I have no evidence that this was in any way caused by Zevia. But its the only thing I can think of.

So I’d had about 2.5 Zevias over the course of 3 days. Zevia is something I bought at Whole Foods last week since I’d read about it on a blog. No calories, all natural, natural diet soda. Sweetened with stevia. I got root beer flavor. Its pretty good. I don’t usually drink soda, rare treat.

Yesterday afternoon, I had some gas. I’ll admit it. I stunk. This might be overshare, but I need to write this down so that I remember the consequences of ingesting large portions of any kind of sweetener besides sugar (though that’s not good either in different ways), even if its a natural sweetener like stevia. So one of the times that I passed gas…… well, let’s just say that for that moment I might as well have been taking Alli. I had to change. My clothes. Major diarrhea followed after I made it to the bathroom. But the initial reaction was WHAT. THE. HECK. JUST. HAPPENED?! Felt like my body had betrayed me. It was awful and gross.

And the ONLY thing I can think of that could have caused this strangeness, the only thing different I’ve had, is the Zevia. We have two cans left. I won’t be drinking them. Not sure what to do with them. Again, no evidence that the Zevia is the cause of my horrible loss of control, but I will be avoiding it anyway.

The end.

Epilogue: In happier news, when I had to change yesterday I tried on a pair of jeans I’ve had for probably 10 years but that I haven’t been able to wear for 4 years. Express Jeans, size 13/14. They fit. They’re snug, but they fit. <<<<Happy Dance>>>>>

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Recap: Friday

September 26, 2009 at 10:58 am (Daily Workouts/Eats, General Life Updates)

Let’s see. Yesterday.

Got hair cut, thinned, highlighted, styled. Love it. So much lighter, like the chunks of blonde. Enjoyed the hairdresser. Expensive. Ouch.

Made another batch of dried fruit. This time, 5 trays of apple chips, 2 trays of kiwi chips, 1 tray of banana chips. YUM!

Made lentil soup. Double YUM! Kids love it, I love it. Ate a bowl before hair appointment, so did kids. Froze half. Refridgerated half. Delicious, healthy, filling lunch or snack.

Made dinner. Sweet and sour chicken w/ green bell pepper (chopped REALLY small so I wouldn’t taste it), brocolli, pineapple. Quinoa to put it on. I enjoyed mine on a big bed of lettuce. Leftovers! 🙂 Also have leftovers of lasagna, so I’m thinking tonight I might not have to make dinner. We’ll see.

Went on bike ride with kids to park after dinner. Swings, slides, sunny. Until it wasn’t. Then we went home.

Worked out light. Did running intervals for 40 min and 1 set of pushups. Been pushing it pretty hard all week, decided to lighten up for a night.

185.5 today. Was 184 yesterday – new low. I never expect to stay at my new lows the first time I hit them, so I’m fine with being up 1.5 pounds this morning. The overall downward trend over that last week makes me happy, and I’m feeling gung-ho.

SATURDAY so far:

Made wheat blender pancakes from whole wheat, oatmeal, spinach, milk, other ingredients. Told an outright LIE to my child when she noticed the green color and balked. Told her I’d just put green food coloring in it to make it fun, like we had done the frosting for her birthday cake. She believed me, didn’t taste the spinach at all, and LOVED the pancakes. Had 3. Am I evil?? Next time, I WILL put food coloring in and see if I can make them PINK. She’d love that. I had my pancakes w/ some NF plain yogurt and a couple of kiwis cut up on top. The kids ate some of my kiwis though so I really only ate about 1.5 kiwis.

I’ve read blogs. Written this post.

That’s about it for today so far.

Going to finish this post and

  • Clean our bathtub
  • Clean the toilets
  • Sweep and mop the kitchen floor
  • Do a load of laundry
  • Iron some shirts in my closet so that I can wear them in a pinch even though they are too big

Sunday we have church and then we are going to my SILs for dinner, probably after Sunday afternoon naps are had by (hopefully) all.

Have a great weekend!

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Playing hookey and loving it

September 24, 2009 at 7:37 pm (Daily Workouts/Eats, General Life Updates)

Due to a slight pause in the middle of the afternoon while I had to stay home because K2 was napping while K went to pick up his nephew from day care and take him home to his 14-yr old sister, I didn’t get all the grocery shopping I wanted to get done finished.

We went to Sam’s as a family. And spent A LOT of money. We bought all the things we were almost or completely out of, big bags of noodles that lasts ages, frozen stuff, lots of meat, snacks for us and the kids, dog food, shampoo stuff, toothbrush heads. And so on. Then, the pause after we unloaded everything at home while K went to take O home. He got back and I left right away to get at least my Walmart list taken care of before he had to leave for work. I got most of what I went for, but since I felt (and was) kind of rushed, there are still a few things.

Since I didn’t get to Whole Foods or get everything at Walmart, I decided to play hookey from work today. I don’t think they missed me at all. 🙂 And instead, I’ve had a very productive day.

I separated all the meat, wrapping it in tinfoil and putting it in baggies in family-meal-sized portions to freeze. This took over an hour. I did the dishes, had breakfast with K2, read him a bunch of books. Got P from school. Sliced up a huge bowl of apple slices to make more dehydrated apple chips (I made a big batch last night, too). When K got up, I went to Whole Foods and then Walmart again. Unfortunately, I took my sweet time at Whole Foods so I was once again rushed at Walmart and didn’t get what I needed. I was trying on br3s, and I’m super-frustrated because I can’t for the life of my figure out what size I am now!! I’m wearing the bra that I was wearing at 230 pounds, and now that I weigh 185 (THIS MORNING!), it just doesn’t fit right, as you can imagine. Anyway, since I was rushed I tried on a bunch, got annoyed and frustrated, and left without any of them. Ugh.

Got home, and whipped up a lasagna. A good one, if I do say so myself. 🙂 Zuchinni and mushroom in the tomato sauce instead of tomato chunks. Yummo! I made two and took one to a lady I know that just gave birth a little while ago and is now undergoing treatments for breast cancer. That felt good to be able to do something small like that. And we still had leftovers of our dish of lasagna. I ate mine with a big lettuce salad.

Tonight I need to unload the apple chips that are almost done and put them in a baggie. The dishes are done. I need to put some laundry away, and I’ll do that while the kids are getting ready for bed. Then, I gotta work out.

Tomorrow, I have an appointment to get my hair highlighted and cut by the same girl who gave me my last haircut about six months ago. The last highlights were almost a year ago now. I’m excited to have her thin it – my hair is super thick and heavy so it hurts when it gets long and isn’t aggressively thinned.

I have more shopping to do. I need a bra. 🙂 I’ve never been measured for one, and I wouldn’t even know how to go about that. I always assumed that the places that do measuring are also selling bras that I can’t afford to buy. So I’m really unsure what to do next because every time I try to find one on my own, I get annoyed and frustrated and confused.

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Money Bags and Playing w/ Kids

September 23, 2009 at 9:55 am (Daily Workouts/Eats, General Life Updates)

Today, the money from a check I deposited last week was released by my bank. Its a lot of money. I’ve paid a few bills this morning, and I’m waiting on the other money-spending I need to do  until K wakes up so that I can make sure we’re both agreed as to how it should be spent. We are getting laminate wood floors for our main level!! The floor that has been plywood and throw rug for over 6 months! I’m so excited to be able to sweep it thoroughly, to have it look nice. Yay, yay, yay!! Other than that, I’m excited about some unbridled grocery shopping. 🙂 And perhaps some new items for the kids… and me… and K. 🙂 Such as a new sports bra, new regular bra, new running shoes that don’t creak. I’m also going to make a hair appointment today for somewhere, perhaps Friday. Going to get cut, thinned, and highlighted, if I can talk myself into the expense. Want to get K2 a tricycle or big wheel that he can reach the peddles on. Perhaps a swing set????? We’ve been wanting one for over 3 years. Okay, moving on.

Yesterday, I managed to turn the TV off for most of the afternoon (we’re all addicted, I know it, we’re working on it), and actually PLAYED with my children. I know, I know, moms do this all the time. I suck at it. I feed my kids, I tell them I love them, tickle them, read to them, give them lots of hugs and kisses. But I let them watch way too much TV. Dora, Backyardigans, Wonder Pets, Blues Clues. All great shows that they love. But I need to curb the boob-tubing. Anyway, we danced to music, we did “exercise” like jumping jacks, races around the house, we played a messed-up version of London Bridges Falling Down, we “jumped rope” in the garage, we rode bikes in the garage. I’m going to try and do stuff like this more and more, because its getting colder and colder and they’ll be cooped up. Usually I send them outside to expend some energy, but we’re going to have to do it inside somehow. It felt good to move around with them, laugh and giggle and be silly. I need to remember that.

This morning, down to 186.5. Had my green oats in the Naturally More peanut butter jar this morning since it was almost gone. Amazingly, I’d left enough in there that it was almost too much and I didn’t scrape it clean like I usually would. Next time, I’ll remember to use a little more of it before using the jar as a bowl.

Grocery shopping later today, I think. Also need to do some cleaning of some sort – perhaps our bathtub and vacuuming upstairs. Laundry and dishes are an every day thing.

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If I Was a Good Blogger

September 22, 2009 at 12:46 pm (Daily Workouts/Eats)

I would have taken a picture of my lunch. It was so good!!

But since I’m not a good blogger, I didn’t. But I do want to write it down, because I better not forget how good it was. Gotta repeat the good ones!

I shredded a small zuchinni and sauteed it with a little bit of olive oil and some chicken taco seasoning. I set the zuchinni aside and used the same pan to cook two tilapia fillets in a little bit of olive oil (I bet in total I didn’t even use a tablespoon). Once they were cooked enough to break apart, I broke it all into little bits and added more chicken taco seasoning. When the fish was done, I measured out 3 oz (about half) of fish and put the rest in a baggy for tomorrow or the next day. Then I added back in the zuchinni and cooked it all together for a few minutes. In the meantime, I had spread about 1/2 T of cream cheese on a whole wheat low-fat, low-carb, high fiber tortilla, and washed and prepped about 3 big leaves of lettuce. Combined it all for a juicy, yummy, high-veggie fish/taco/zuchinni burrito!

SO GOOD!!! It filled me up, too, I think. 🙂 I ate it so fast I’m not sure my brain has gotten the message yet. I LOVE ZUCHINNI!!!

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Decision and Small Victories

September 22, 2009 at 9:24 am (Daily Workouts/Eats, General Life Updates)

After going to the office yesterday and basically sneaking out an hour earlier without saying goodbye to anyone, I was feeling pretty crappy. I hadn’t had a lot to do at the office, and I didn’t feel like going around and asking everyone what work they had for me, so I just left. But not before I had quite a few chocolates. Its a good thing I left at 3 instead of 4, or who knows how many more I would have consumed.

I came home and there were pink wafer cookies sitting on the kitchen counter. Before the night was over I’d had a total of 4. We had a healthy dinner that K made, but I was feeling so discouraged. I’d eaten a lot of healthy, good food throughout the day, but I’d also had too many treats. I convinced myself probably about 20 times that it was no use, I should just sit on my butt and eat some more before I went to bed. And about 20 times, I told myself I had to work out. I hadn’t worked out since Thursday other than a bike ride with the kids, and I needed the exercise. I knew it would make me feel better, but its so hard to remember that before the sweat and endorphins are flowing. But, as the kids were getting ready for bed, I came downstairs with my weights (they’ve been upstairs since last week), and set up the treadmill. Then I went back upstairs and got dressed for working out while the kids watched their bed-time Blues Clues.

And I did it. I worked out. Despite all the negative self-talk I had going on, all the “I can’t do it’s” and “its no use’s” running through my head faster than any of my treadmill workouts. And it felt great, and afterwards, as predicted, I felt so much better. I drank a lot of water. I didn’t even think about eating anything.

187 this morning.

I also spoke with K about the baby-making question, and my concerns have been laid to rest by the decision we’d already made. We are still going to start trying next month. I can’t put off our family any longer, and these habits are just going to have to stick through pregnancy so I can pick up with losing weight after the baby comes (that is, assuming a baby comes).

So, I’m feeling better today. I had a kids yogurt w/ berries and 2 zuchinni/oat bran muffins w/ drizzled honey for breakfast. Since I don’t know the calorie or fiber content of the muffins I don’t know how long this breakfast will hold me, but it was satisfying and yummy and different.

Today, I’m going to do laundry, dishes, maybe clean some toilets, and try making hummus.

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Trying to be gentle

September 21, 2009 at 9:16 am (Daily Workouts/Eats, General Life Updates)

This weekend was ridiculous. I feel like such a fool after all that talk about not having any more treats until Tuesday (now tomorrow). I felt so “off” Friday and Saturday. My inner 5-year old came out in force with the “I don’t wanna’s” and the “you can’t make me’s“. I ate too much, and not of good stuff. I didn’t exercise. It was not pretty. But I’m trying to be gentle on myself and not beat myself up so much that it is counter-productive.

Finding myself up to 191 on Sunday morning was not a surprise, but it was sad. Our church ward had a special day of fasting on Sunday for two couples in our ward that are struggling with some stuff. I’m not sure what, but I was happy to participate, looking on a day of not eating as a chance to give myself a break from food choices, good, bad or otherwise. I had a hearty meal with lots of potatoes at my parents’ house last night, and had apple pie and ice cream for dessert. But I chose to not follow my instincts when we got home, which were telling me to have a snack. Have a snack. HAVE A SNACK. I reminded myself that I was still full. That the first day of choosing better is never easy. And that I didn’t need to eat anything, especially if I want to get back in the 180’s and below. The chances that the self-talk would work were 50/50, and somehow I stayed out of the kitchen.

This morning, I’m down to 189. I’ve written down a couple of things that I would like to re-implement from when I was doing the LIFE diet back in March. This morning’s green oatmeal had more spinach, and less fruit. I only used a 1/2 cup of fruit instead of a full cup, but the spinach was probably up to 3 or more oz from the usual 2. I told K yesterday that I was going to get a little stricter for a while and he agreed he’d try to help. Though sometimes that doesn’t mean much since he can’t make my choices for me.

A couple of the things I’m going to do:

  • Reign the size/portion of my snacks back in to bring them down to 150-200 calorie range instead of 200-300 range.
  • Go back to only having starch with dinner every 3 days.
  • Start measuring/weighing cheese portions again. I’ve been eye-balling it for months now, and I have a feeling the portions have grown from 1 oz to 2 or 3 every time I have cheese.
  • I’m going to make some of my healthy meals such as lentil soup, veggie soup to freeze and use as healthy fillers.
  • I went through my food log to see which meals I haven’t done in a while. I tend to latch onto things I like and repeat them, but there were some that I like that I haven’t done in quite a while. Examples: tilapia tacos, chicken-apple-chickpea salad, tortilla pizza, creamy eggs.

I’m feeling rejuvenated today and ready to take it on. This week is going to be pretty jam-packed, and I’ll feel so much better and able to face everything if my health goals are on track.

K asked me last night if I am sure I want to start trying for a baby next month, or if I’d rather wait until the beginning of next year. I honestly don’t know how to answer him. Honestly, my feelings are mixed. Here are my reactions, not necessarily in order of importance.

  1. The idea of getting pregnant and being off the hook for losing weight has its appeal. This worries me because one of my goals is to continue my healthy habits throughout my pregnancy (and the rest of my life), so if I’m feeling relief at the idea of being off the hook, am I really committed to staying in check as far as eating/exercising goes?
  2. The idea of growing our family has huge appeal. We’ve both wanted more kids this entire time, and I feel like my inability to lose the weight super-fast is holding up the progression of our family. I don’t want to be selfish, but I want to be completely ready to face the pregnancy and the extra responsibility that follows.
  3. Having more time to lose a few more pounds (I’d probably set a goal of 10-15 more pounds for the end of the year) also has huge appeal. The smaller I am, the stronger and tighter my muscles, the less extra weight I’m carrying – all these things I think will help with the pregnancy. And make it easier afterward to recover and lose the baby weight (assuming my weight gain is controlled and within reason). Also, losing a few more pounds before another pregnancy just appeals regardless of the pregnancy.
  4. I’ve told quite a few people we’re going to start trying in October. Are they going to bug me and harrass me about it if I’m not pregnant by November? Will I have the humility to tell them we changed our mind, or will I just let them think its taking a while to accomplish the goal?

All these factors run through my mind. And more. I just am not sure. I’m going to talk to K about it some more today, if we get a chance (I’m going to the office), to see what his thoughts/feelings are on the subject.

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All That Talk

September 19, 2009 at 7:18 pm (Daily Workouts/Eats, General Life Updates)

And I’m full of crap. The last couple days have been an utter mess health-wise.

I don’t really feel like talking about it, but I feel like I should admit it. If I can only convince myself to work out tonight despite how I’m feeling, I might be able to contain the damage a little bit.

Ugh.

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