Refinding Mojo

May 12, 2009 at 10:55 am (Daily Workouts/Eats, General Life Updates, Plan)

After almost 2 weeks of going up and down with the same 3 pounds and a few nights where I snacked too much instead of exercising, I’ve been analyzing my actions and motivations to try and figure out what went wrong with my mojo. For 2 months, I ate what was allowed, when it was allowed (including a few treats), and I lost weight steadily and rather quickly. And then the last 2 weeks. So, in trying to figure out where my determination and devotion went, I’ve identified a few things.

1) I feel SO much better after having lost about 25 pounds that I was already starting to get complacent again. I can move so much easier, my clothes either all fit or are all too big (there are a few I still can’t get into). I am just so much more comfortable. But let’s face it folks, I still weight over 200 pounds and I’m still overweight. If I were to get pregnant now, I’d be right back where I started by the time the baby arrived. I’m still on the top range of ‘normal’ size clothes and dipping into the plus size clothes. I still can’t get my wedding rings on and wear them comfortable (can get on the band but its too snug and can’t get on the engagement ring).

  • a) To try and give myself a reality check in this regard, I decided to take some progress pictures. I might try to combine them with older pictures to show the actual progress, but they were mostly for me to look at and see all the problematic areas that are still there, no matter how good I feel. Now, its a good thing that not many people read this blog because I’m sure there would be a bunch of people that think this is a negative and harmful thing to do to myself. But I didn’t do it so that I’d feel bad about myself or nitpick the imperfections in the picture – I was actually quite pleased with how much better my swimsuit fit me. No, I took those pictures so that I could see how much farther I CAN go, if I so choose. To show myself that though I’ve made progress, I can definitely still get healthier – and smaller.

2) I decided I was trying to get too much done at night after the kids went to bed. I was exercising, often doing the dishes from dinner and the rest of the day, taking a shower, watching shows, and studying my scriptures. The packed and strict schedule that I had to keep after the kids were down was starting to wear me out. I evaluated all these activities and decided that I could move some stuff around. There is usually plenty of time during the day to get the dishes from breakfast, lunch, and snacks into the dishwasher so that the only thing I have to deal with in the evening is dinner dishes. And I can usually get those done before the kids go to bed if I just remember to do it. My scripture study has been moved to the afternoon, and I’ve set an alarm on my phone to go off at 3 PM to remind me if I haven’t already done it. I’m also hoping to use this time of day to make sure the TV is off and to do some activity with P, just us one-on-one time. Moving this around should leave my evenings a little less overwhelming – I just have to exercise and shower. I’ve also made it a goal to try and work out in the afternoon one or two times a week to free up the evening for some relaxing. I haven’t implemented that yet, and it won’t start today.

3) Using sparkpeople. I need to remember that using sparkpeople to track my calories is supposed to help me realize how much I’m ingesting so that I can better control it and eat healthily. But after doing it for a while (2 months), a lot of the things that I eat are similar each day or every few days and I have a good idea what the calorie content is for most of them. So obsessively entering it into sparkpeople to see how many calories I have ‘left’ is not helpful. I should eat my prescribed snacks and meals within reason and then if I’m still hungry I should choose another healthy snack – preferably fruit or veggie. And I’m going to loosen up dinners a little bit so that it isn’t always meat, salad, veggies. For example, last night I made some simple beef enchiladas and they were good. I had 2 with salad and veggies, and it was a nice change from a slab of meat by itself. So I’m going to try and broaden dinner horizons to include some casseroles and such, which I will try to make with healthy ingredients and then measure out a reasonable portion for myself.

These small changes aren’t much, but they seem to have helped for now. Yesterday was a great day. I think I ate around 1400 calories and I worked out hard last night. I finally got my new weights for my 205 reward yesterday, and I’m looking forward to my 200 reward very much. So hopefully that will help me get to it. Sunday I fasted, though I’d like to do better on my next fast (in a religious sense, not dietary).

Now, to get off the computer and try to have an active day. I also find that the days when I’m more active and get more things done, I’m more motivated to eat well and not binge. The hopeless, worthless feeling that comes from being too idle is a large contributer to overeating.


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