Losing all interest

October 15, 2008 at 10:07 am (Daily Workouts/Eats)

I know I need to continue to perform at my job right up until they’re not paying me anymore. But I’ve totally lost interest in everything going on there, everything I’m supposed to do. For example, there is a revised deliverable that is supposed to go out on Friday (preferably Thursday). I am going to go into the office tomorrow afternoon after P’s field trip to Venetucci Ranch (pumpkins), but I’ve told them I’ll be later than usual. I probably won’t get there until about 1:30, which only leaves me 3.5 hours before K will have to be picking me up so he can go to work. They’ll have to work on the deliverable before I get there, or it won’t get done in time, and I can’t (read “won’t”) come in Friday, too. Then Monday, everyone will know. I’m so nervous, but I keep telling myself like a mantra, there will never be a good time, there will never be a good time. Meaning, there’s never going to be such a cessation of work that it won’t bother them that I’m leaving, that it won’t cause an inconvenience to figure out who is going to do my duties. Now really isn’t a good time for them, but there will never be a good time. Its only going to get busier, so now is as good as ever.

227 again this morning. Did BWO+ last night using the beginning of Tempo2. For a 16 minute workout, I sure did sweat a lot. I think it would be interesting to strap myself into some running shoes and a good sports bra and see how my running ability has suffered/improved while I’ve been doing all this T-Tapp. Maybe I’ll try that sometime soon, like maybe my first day of no work. Its going to be so weird!! Not to have this laptop, not to have anyone to report to, not to have anything to be responsible for except my family and myself. Also, not going to have a paycheck. 🙂 Phew.

I think we’re filing today. No more on that for now; don’t want to jinx it.

Last night, I also managed to get myself out of the downstairs before I ate too much. I had two small bowls of yogurt (by small, I mean these little dessert bowls we have that hold 8 oz if you fill them to the brim) w/ some chocolate powder. I had almost convinced myself to have some cold cereal after that, but when I got up to get the cold cereal, I redirected myself at the stairs and stayed upstairs watching TV in bed until I turned it off to go to sleep about 11.

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